I know a lot of you won't be reading this until after you've already seen the finale so I'll try to keep it simple.
It's Day 34 and Rupert fishes coconuts out of a tree. They've nailed ladder rungs onto the tree trunk. It's the Swiss Family Rupertson.
Jenna tells Rupert that he has to win Immunity so they can vote out Rob. But Rob has walked up behind them! Rupert tries to play it off like they were talking about Tom. He's a terrible liar.

Will the Dream Team do it?
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Rob goes to Amber and says, "We've got problems. Big problems."
Amber now wears Rob's hat during interviews.
The Reward Challenge is for the truck. Why does it always have to be such a hideous color?
It's a second chance at some of the previous Challenges, with one person eliminated after each round. The winner will also get to watch a drive-in movie and eat snacks. Jeff mentions that the person who has won the car has never won Survivor. Interesting. And who were those car winners?
S1: no car awarded
S2: Colby
S3: Lex
S4: Sean
S5: Ted (because Brian couldn't spell "road")
S6: Matthew
S7: Burton
So Brian should have won the car and Colby should have won the game. Maybe the car hex makes you stupid.
Rupert comes in last on the balance beam, Jenna is eliminated on the sliding puzzle and Tom is out after the stomp-items-into-an-elevated-basket game. We've got a lovers' spat for the truck.

Dead-plant color is in style.
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It's a rope course. Gee, who's the favorite here? Rob kicks Ambers butt and wins the entire state of Colorado. Oh wait, that's just the dumb name of the truck. Chevy also sells the Avalanche. Are they big hockey fans?
Naturally, Rob gets to pick someone to join him for the movie. He has to know choosing Amber guarantees the others will plot against him, right? "Gotta be Ambuh," he says without hesitation. I hope he really enjoys that truck.
Jeff calls shotgun and they drive off. Rob is a maniac behind the wheel and almost takes out the movie screen. Jeff sets them up and says, "Uh, one more thing." Amber gets a car too. It's the "Malibu Max." Does Malibu Max pimp ho's in Colorado?
Rob and Amber watch "Lord of the Flies" from the back of the truck. She tells us she wondered what their first date would be like, and what Rob would bring her. "Flowers…a car," she ponders. "I'll take the car."
The light from the projector fades into the moon. Ooo-la-la.
Back at camp Rupert hopes they bring back food. Amber tells them about her car and Jenna and Tom don't look pleased. Rupert says they did bring back candy but divided it into five groups! They're sure trying hard to lose this.
Amber and Rob smooch some more. They are drunk on new car.
Day 36. Rupert and Tom work while Rob and Amber sit. Rupert asks Tom if he'd be willing to break up Rob and Amber. Go Rupert go!
Then Rob goes to work. He accuses Tom of changing sides. Tom denies it. Rob says that's what Rupert has been saying. Tom confronts Rupert in front of Rob. They argue and both say the other person wanted Rob out. The master just watches and smirks. "The reason I did this," he says, "was to get them at each other's throats so that neither of them will have enough sense to go to each other and try to get me and Ambuh off, and I think I succeeded."

Soon-to-be-Boston Amber?
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The Immunity Challenge is a word scramble with all 17 of the previous tribe names. The intersecting letters will then spell a final word.
We've got a nice "live" scoreboard on the screen as they find words. Rob is the first to five. Amber is the first to ten, with Rob right behind. Amber leads 16-14. She finds her final word. Tom ties Rob at 15. Amber can't figure out the mystery word. Rob and Tom both find #16. Rob gets the last one. And he bangs out the word for victory! "Chaboga Mogo." Come on, Amber. Rob is teh 1337. The others are pwn3d. w00t.
Tom apologizes to Rob and Amber for the earlier blowup and promises loyalty again. Jenna says she still has her alliance with Amber and Rob. No Tom/Jenna alliance with each other?
Rob and Amber talk to Tom again. Rob flat-out asks him if he's ever talked about voting Rob out. Tom says, "Absolutely not!" Rob asks what will happen after they vote Jenna out. Tom says, "I don't know. You tell me." Not a good answer no matter what your plan is.
Rob, Amber and Tom shake on voting out Jenna.
At Tribal Council Shii Ann is all spiffed up with makeup. Amber says, "I can smell the money, it's so close." Lex and Shii Ann roll their eyes.
Jeff asks what Tom would think if it's him tonight. "You know what?" the goat farmer asks. "'Et tu, Brute.' Even Jesus said it: 'Even you, Peter, betrayed me.'" Wait, wasn't Judas the betrayer? Tom is obviously referring to Mark 14:29-30 which says, "Peter declared, 'Even if all fall away, I will not.' 'I tell you the truth,' Jesus answered, 'today--yes, tonight--before the rooster crows twice you yourself will disown me three times.'" Well done, Tom.
We see no votes but hear Rob say, "The pony ride's over. You're welcome, for carrying you this far." That could apply to any of them.
The tally goes: "Genna" (that's gotta be Tom's vote), then Tom, Tom…Tom!
Jeff: "Big Tom, the tribe has spoken."
Tom: "I heard it."

Tom heard it.
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He turns around and gives Rob one final glare before he leaves. In his final words Tom talks about getting stabbed in the back by Rob and Amber and adds, "I'm gonna be on that jury and the stickin's gonna be my turn." He finishes with, "I'm gonna live with it happily ever after. So farewell, fair-weathered friend!"
So Tom actually did worse than last time (fifth instead of fourth) and we're left with a 10th, a 6th, and two 8ths, a.k.a., "The Robfather. Beautiful Amber. Jenna the single mom. And Rupert the gentle giant." That over-the-top promo is probably the best part of the final week of each season.
The two-hour finale and reunion show on Sunday will feature "a surprise so big it will stun everyone. We guarantee it."
And the entire first season is now available on DVD! That's great news since I didn't see the first few episodes. You know we'll review it here.
So what is up with Rob dumping Tom? The guy does an AMAZING job it pitting Tom and Rupert against each other, but then he doesn't take full advantage of it? The ideal situation in a group of five is to have an alliance of three, and then have a sub-alliance of two within that three. If Rob keeps Tom, he votes out Rupert and Jenna, then if either he or Amber win the final Immunity they take each other into the final.
But wait, you say, with Tom's less than emphatic answers, Rob couldn't trust him to stay loyal. Yeah, but the only way voting out Tom works is if Rob believes that Jenna and/or Rupert will also vote off Tom. And if that's the case, by process of elimination, Rob knows Tom doesn't have enough votes to take out Rob.
So we're possibly left with two couples and the chance for a voting tie. More likely however, we have Jenna stupidly thinking aligning with Rob and Amber is the right move, and she'll stab Rupert to get to the final three and take her chances in the last Immunity.
This is the point where I predict everyone's chances in front of the jury against each other. It seems pretty cut-and-dried to me this time around: If Rob's there at the end, he wins. Yes, he hasn't made many friends this season, but I think the jury has enough respect for the game to realize that Rob played them masterfully and deserves the cash.
If we have a huge upset and Rob's not there, I'll pick Amber over either Rupert or Jenna (she'll have Rob and Shii Ann's votes for sure), and Rupert over Jenna. Basically, if Jenna doesn't win, I'm happy. But Rob has earned every penny of that million.
Last week I closed by saying, "Rob's powers of persuasion will get a serious test Thursday." Well, he passed with a high enough score to get into Hahvahd.
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