I had forgotten how great these filler episodes are, and by "great" I mean "pretty worthless."

Here's a quick rundown of all the new footage:

Day 1 - The Young Women struggle to open a coconut. Sally likes the machete.

Tina finds an oyster that has been lodged in the rock for "millions of years." She secretly eats it.

Bruce can't sleep the first night so he does karate. He says he envisions fighting opponents. "Sometimes I practice 100 at a time." Me too! Shane comments that Bruce wants to "get his Miyagi on." Wax on.

Day 2 - Courtney asks Misty if she found the Immunity Idol. Misty doesn't give a direct answer. Sally says she didn't believe Misty had it but the other girls did.

Night 3 - Bruce uses some of the Older Men's limited drinking water to wash his hands, during a rainstorm no less. He says something about having some sort of allergic reaction. I think he hurt his hands fighting those invisible guys.

Day 4 - Courtney teaches the girls a song in Spanish. We're reminded this isn't American Idol.

This isn't new footage, but it was Danielle who picked Shane for her tribe, and she even called him the "cool guy." Ha!

Day 5 - Cirie and Melinda lick water off of plants.

Night 7 - After the Challenge where they had to stand on the beam in the water and catch balls from the slingshot, Bobby tells Casaya he should've been out catching. Danielle says he should've spoken up beforehand. Bob says Shane and his alliance act like "seventh grade girls" in the way they exclude the others. He tells Courtney she has a negative attitude. Basically, he says lots of cool Bob things.

Aras is named leader for future Challenges.

Day 8 - Casaya kills and eats a snake. Courtney says snakes symbolize transformation and she thanks it for dying.

Day 9 - It's Boston Powers, International Son of Lunacy's 13th birthday and Daddy Shane is again regretting coming on Survivor. That night the tribe sings "Happy Birthday" to Boston. It's more than a feeling.

Day 10 - Austin bonds with Sally by listening while she talks about getting divorced and being alienated by her parents. This would explain (in addition to her athleticism) why he pushed so hard to save her.

Day 12 - Danielle is angry with Bobby for not working and for sleeping too much. She calls him out of bed to start the fire. Bobby plays dumb like he doesn't know what he's doing and she believes him. She gets frustrated, takes over the work for him, and sends him back to bed. Take note, gentlemen.

Casaya bathes. We get a close-up of Danielle's motionless boobs, in case there was any doubt they are fake. She and Courtney wash each other and claim a bar of soap exclusively for the females. Shane says he wants to tell them, "That's the lunatics' soap!"

The show ends with Bobby flexing and naming his poses followed by a "Whoa whoa!" I am going to miss that Bob Dog.

So next week there is no Survivor whatsoever. Let's take care of each other and we can get through this.

--

P.S. CATS WIN! CATS WIN!! Shane has a better chance of winning than we do on Sunday, but at least Arizona lives to play another day.

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